The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner, Existential Solitude, Death and Taxes: Director's Blog 32

Our new Constitution is now established, and has an appearance that promises permanency; but in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.—Benjamin Franklin  in a letter to Jean-Baptiste Leroy, 1789

So it is morning again. Pondering on the above I am struck by the thought that of course Night and Day are also certain, well at least for the moment Ben.

Today was a day of conflicting feelings for me. I knew that it was time to return to Arc business as usual, although latterly Cinderella has come to feel like Arc business as usual for me, if not for Nita and the Mother ship team back at the Malthouse. 

It was strange to drive to the Malthouse to park today, following a long time stuck in traffic on the M11 listening to Radio 3.  I was late for my away-day meeting with colleagues at Eastbury Manor House, where we were due to develop the next steps for the delivery of an exciting new arts project for the borough, an Arts Council initiative to increase local access and engagement in the arts. The project has lots of promise and a certain amount of potential pitfalls, but its exciting and a great opportunity to have investment for the arts in the borough, given the brutal cuts. 

What this meeting meant for me also was the first evidence of letting go of my now grown up child - Cinderella. I can honestly say this with no melancholy but real pride in the team we have brought together,

But how things change don't they? and when they do you are confronted with what that means for you. However hard one might wish to cleave to a beloved child, we all know that there is an absolute inevitability that we must let them go. Its that thing isn't it?  if you love someone then the best thing you can do is to grant them total freedom from you. Its a great ambition, and sometimes we can do it with elegance and at other times with the clumsiness which is now known as my signature!

And so it was that at the end of the day I felt pretty rough with the CInderella Lergie 
(Barbara seems to be on the mend btw).  But I could not shlep up the M11 to Great Dunmow without a short visit to the show. I managed to slip into the last ten minutes of Act 2, and joined Phil in the band stand! And once again I felt my spirits rise to be with my panto family again.

And then to the existential solitude bit of my title. And actually that solitude is an essential part of the letting go process. Its the dynamic moment when you look across a room and understand that all has changed from what it was. Its right, its healthy but it don't half hurt! Don't get me wrong this is not about my eliciting your pity,God forbid that! Its just an observation about the relentlessness of change. 

I will not go into the show but leave the  acting company the space to get on with it in Phil's capable hands. I have already told MJ,the Company Manager that from now on in I am vesting the Artistic Leadership of Team Cinderella in Phil. When I am not there, he will be the one who gives any performance or tech notes that apply to the actors. He is part of the team but has an executive role as such. From working with him now for 6 months  and from the trust we have built I have come to feel that he has earned the right to be called my co-producer. He has been there for me through all the pain and the joy as my trusty lieutenant. He has the same forensic eye (and ear) as I do and so I know that the show is in very safe hands. He will of course be in regular contact with me and will update me daily on how its going and whether I need to come in for any reason. Of course I have always planned to be in for at least 3 or 4 shows a week.  

Friday is Press night and that promises to be fun! I am really looking forward to it, and I know on that particular day I will have a very specific role to play, namely making sure that we are happy and confident in our show and proud of it whatever the critics throw at us. 

And lastly of course we must never forget that our audience is king. Let them tell us if we have achieved our goal "To make a new musical woven through with the delights of traditional Pantomime"  I believe that we have. I am supremely proud of the whole Team Cinderella, and particularly of our 16 amazing children of the Young Company. But in the end the audience will vote with its feet. 

Bring it on!