A Panto is Made, A show is born and the cycle begins again. Director's Blog 24

Today my blog entry is a prayer. Its a prayer of gratitude. I warn you though, it may end up being my longest. I appreciate that for some of my readers this may not be of interest right now. So please feel free to skip today's blog if you so wish! I promise there will be no memory tests, honest.

Our call this morning is 11.30 am so time for a small pause and to reflect on my personal panto journey over the past six months. If you are still reading this I beg your momentary indulgence while I share some of it with you. What is a 'panto' journey you may well ask. Isn't that making too much of it?  

Well you can make your own mind up! 

One thing that is certain for Olly, Nita, Natalie, Theresa, Josh and I is that whether we are making a small drama workshop for five year olds or a major touring play  - we always have to bring vision, attention to detail and effort regardless of theme or budget!  (Probably why we will never make our financial fortune!)

Back in early January the decision by the Council to cut much of its grant to the Broadway Theatre became a sad reality.The theatre was to be a certain casualty of central government austerity measures to be implemented by the local administration. This was inevitably to be tough for all those elected councillors and officers who had to make decisions they would have preferred not to have done. 

It goes without saying that we all know and have experienced over the past four years what this has come to mean. How the soul and spirit of so many precious things have been ripped out callously from some of those unique experiences that make us human. 

Sadly the very heart of a community is wounded when the invisible alchemy that the arts bring quietly and sometimes not so quietly to most people's lives, is the first thing to go. 

At a practical level of course it all makes perfect sense, after all the bins must be emptied, the elderly and vulnerable cared for,our children educated and the inflation rate controlled. I get this of course. If you can't eat, keep warm or learn what on earth can the arts do for you? And the job of the Council is to balance the books to ensure that the vicious cuts can keep these essential services safe. And so it was that the Broadway had to take its share of the collective pain. 

Indeed  2013 will be an even tougher year in truth for Arc as the Council arts budget will be cut entirely. For me and my team this means the withdrawal of our grant and the subsequent financial implications for our ability to continue to develop our work in and for our community of Barking and Dagenham.

The past few weeks of rehearsals have proved to be a welcome relief from the battles for survival for our company. A company that I have built with Olly, Nita, Natalie and Theresa over the past 28 years. 

These rehearsals have reminded me of who I am and why I still love this perhaps strange way of living as an artist.

Its a tough one to have to consider the letting go of Arc as we know it. But in spite of the pain to come next year, I am mostly optimistic that with this seismic change there will be opportunity. I have just the beginning of a clue as to the direction I would like things to go. And it will be radical I have no doubt. It always has been. 

Long ago I came to understand and to fully experience the relentless dynamic of change. The very things that are most precious to us, that seem certain and indeed to define who we are, will one day pass and become dust. Please don't think for a moment that this is in any way pessimistic, in fact it is the contrary. It is simply what it is. 

The one certainty we have is that regardless of whether we like it or not things are in constant change and flux and will always be so, however hard we might try to hang on to those things we love and hold dear. For me accepting this has led to a much greater sense of liberation in my own artistic life. I appreciate that it is not easy though, but maybe anything too easily acquired will not stand the test of time anyway?

And to the panto.

Out of the pain of the loss of funding to the theatre came unexpectedly the wonderful opportunity for Arc to be commissioned to produce and direct this year's pantomime. I say this not from any place of superiority. What I found unexpectedly hidden in the rubble was a little gold nugget for Arc, which I grasped with both hands whilst simultaneously mourning the loss of the theatre as it had been. 

I feel sad especially for those committed people who had brought their hearts to making the theatre work for the past few years. For Karena Johnston, the current Artistic Director and CEO this must have been devastating, and I hope that when she returns from maternity leave, we will be able to share our love and ideas for the theatre going forward. For my friends on the original Broadway board of trustees on which I was privileged to sit for 3 years, for John Middleton and Joan Brandon in particular, trustees who I value very highly and who remain my friends.

I have no idea at all if there will be a place for Arc in the Broadway's next incarnation, and if not then that will be just as it needs to be. I will not even attempt to prejudge this. What will be will be.

And so it was that I found myself agreeing the budget in May, thanks to the support of Chris Mellor, the current Interim Creative Producer, who supported me hugely throughout the negotiations of budgets and people during the early spring.

I have enormous personal gratitude to Anne Bristow (Corporate Director Adult and Community Services at London Borough of Barking and Dagenham) and Paul Hogan (Divisional Director, Culture and Sport) for demonstrating their faith and trust in me and my team.  After all it was (and still is,the show hasn't opened yet!) a huge act of trust on their behalf. Not least because whilst they know the quality of our work generally, they also know that I have never produced let alone directed a pantomime before, and although Olly has written many many plays, including children's musical shows this was to be a real departure for us. 

But this is no place for self-indulgence frankly. Its a serious matter, that if you are arrogant or ignorant enough to take on then you have to deliver! Its been an opportunity that has excited me more than many of the last 28 years, but it would be a lie to say that it wasn't also the most terrifying!  Ignorance is bliss? Well it certainly was until I came to realise what I had signed us up for!   Thankfully I was helped by a long time mantra of Olly's and mine from the write Ray Bradbury, author of Fahrenheit 451 who died in June. You may be familiar with it. 

At times of particular change and fear both Olly and I remind each other of these words which have secretly driven us forward since we began the Arc Project in 1984: 

"You’ve got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down."

So there you have it friends, that just about sums Arc up.

So following the agreement for us to produce the pantomime, I very quickly decided that Cinderella was to be my choice. Pragmatically it is the best known and most loved of pantomimes, and at its heart is the story of loss, hope and salvation. Particularly pertinent I think for our times.

As I have mentioned before, Denise Cresswell, Front of House and Customer Service Manager at the Broadway was always going to be my first port of call. I asked her who she thought I should approach to be Musical Director and Choreographer, and without a breath she directed me to Phil and Owen. How right she was to do so! Not only have they become our best collaborators ever, but now our best friends!  You see Denise, Phil and Owen really know what they are talking about when it comes to panto - and indeed Phil has been MD on five of the seven pantomimes produced for the Broadway. This never ceases to amaze me as that makes him only 22 when he did his first! Eat your heart out Mozart!

The project was truly ignited at a "Show and tell" meeting on June 7th with all four of us. It was a blast and after a couple of hours sharing how we work, it was a done deal. I have just been looking at the email trail from back then, and thought I would share with you just how quickly things got moving! 

From me to Paul Hogan on June 7th: 

"Hi Paul,  Can we touch base today? meeting potential choreographer and MD this morning. Will keep you in the loop and let you know how it goes and whether they are the right people" 

And to Phil and Owen the same day 

"Hi Both -  I hope all is well. I am delighted to confirm that we are all systems go with panto.  I am just waiting for the council to get their contract to me and then we will issue your contracts asap. I will come back to you individually by email in the first instance to confirm fees as discussed etc; "

And then it all started very quickly, from Phil on June 14 

" Hi Carole ,I’m planning on putting an email together for you with lots of info about the music/sound area of the show, just to outline what, historically, have been the best uses of the budget to get the best possible sound for the money. That way, when you speak with the theatre etc, you have a bit of background knowledge on the department. Would this be useful? "

And then on July just as Olly was begining to write and I was meeting with Ian about design!

"Hi Olly,

Another mock up for you – it’s a possible idea for the duet (replace “she” with “he” for Cinderella’s verse!) Yet again, some truly awful lyrics just to give me something to sing a melody to (rather than la la la!), so please discard and replace with real words if you think the song has legs. Think I’d be able to knock a nice harmony/countermelody over it to make for a big finale to the song etc.Could also be turned into a Solo if a duet for Cinderella and Charming wasn’t right. Its up to you really – if it doesn’t fit,  then no probs! Phil"

And that is the tone in which most of our conversations have continued ever since. Olly and I could never have got off first base in spite of all the years we have made new work, if it were not for the hand holding given to us both by Phil and Owen. If we do manage to touch the hearts and souls of our audience and get them to feel 2 hours of joy then it is mostly down to these two talented guys! 

And last but certainly not least to yesterday. Our baby was born at 11am in the auditorium of the Broadway Theatre Barking. She is called Cinderella and I have it on best authority that mother and baby are doing well!

So now to today and our final Dress Rehearsal. I am so excited, so excited to share the work of my lovely Team Cinderella with an audience now. I think we are almost ready to open up the auditorium and our story to them. Tomorrow's school performances will be our first opportunity to do this. 

Oh yes - I don't for a moment want you to get the impression that we "luvvies" are not as tough as nails! This common perception could be no further from the truth! And believe me I will never ever be happy or complacent until the last show comes down on January 2nd and we have a big knees up! (And probably not even then!)

My time is nearly over now, the lion's share of my job now done.Its nearly time for the Director to disappear as the writer had to do three weeks ago and hand our precious baby over to our trusty team.

So hopefully it will be me in the back row of the theatre tomorrow, nonchalantly pairing my finger nails (check out James Joyce's: Portrait of an Artist if you are interested in this reference!)  

Its time for me to leave shortly, well certainly by December 8th after Press Night! 

I always find this letting go to be the most painful part of making new work, but it has to be done. The company need to take on full ownership from early next week. So you see after all the nurturing, passion and love that everyone has brought to Cinderella - finally Panto Grows up! 

I promise that if you have managed to get to the end of this missive, tomorrow's will be short, pithy and probably full of self doubt and also maybe some clarity about what works and doesn't work - so possibly back to murdering my darlings! 

Thanks so much to the Mums and the Arc Community Players who gave us an intimate and supportive audience for last night's Team One Dress Rehearsal. As I have said on a number of occasions in this blog - you are as important a part of Team Cinderella as we all are!

That's it.